dc parking ticket count for the week: 2 ($20 & $50)
two of my cousins were just in town visiting, so my mother and I drove downtown this morning with Alex to pick up Hallie so we could spend the afternoon together. About 5 minutes into the ride my mother mentions that hopefully the back pain she'd been having the day before would finally subside since she had just taken some medicine... so of course my first thought is what in the hell. I asked her was she took and she was all nonchalantly like, "oh you know flexeril, I told the doctor I didn't want any percocet." So I'm sitting there staring at her smiling this cheshire cat smile, realizing that my mother is high and hurtling down the freeway. As if that couldn't be more absurd she was speaking to Hallie on the phone so I ask her to ask Hallie to come downstairs "like right now" so my mother turned right...then...
Then taking Alex to the airport today she, Hallie, my mother and I all stopped into the Barnes & Noble in Georgetown to kill a little time. We got a really prime parking spot right in front, the premise was that you would use this communal meter like four cars behind us and purchase a parking pass good for two hours. It was out of order, which only took the three of them like 5 minutes to come to terms with while I coughed and hacked my life up inside Sephora waiting for them. So being the person that birthed a person such as myself my mother decides that there is just no possible way we are giving this spot up and writes a note on the back of the envelope that read the following: "12/16 2:36pm
we attempted to purchase a parking pass, unfortunately the meter is broken.
apologies."
I'm not kidding.
Anyways so we go into Barnes & Noble, Alex and Hallie grab coffees, my mother looked around for the new Sierra Club calendar for 2009, I got myself a lovely new book. I've found the older I get the more interested I become in non-fiction literature. To the point that I almos
t exclusively read it. I suppose that's another reason I'm not an English major. After all purchases have been made we decide to make our way towards the door, but before we left we had wanted to take a couple of pictures to remember all of us spending the afternoon together. My family is two things for certain, we are all indecisive and do everything at the last possible moment, i.e. taking family portraits at B&N. Whatever, so my mother walks up to this young woman and asked if she might not mind taking our picture real quickly. She responded with, "um I mean I don't know we may get in
trouble, is this illegal?" To which I told her that if we got caught we were throwing her under the bus (to use a Top Chef favorite idiom). She didn't find me particularly funny, she did however take our picture...and on two separate cameras. Although I do have to say I've never seen someone look so uncomfortable. I felt like the Germans might be coming at any second.
Of course my day doesn't end there, stepping out of the bookstore a homeless man approached me and asked if I had any spare change. I apologized and told him that I unfortunately didn't (which if you're wondering is true because I was out with Momma Moneybags) and all he had to say in response was, "damn you got a deep voice". You better believe my family didn't drop that one. I wish that I had given him money, and then that I'd taken it back and told him it was for my corrective surgery, obviously I'm not taking a high enough dosage of estrogen.
Well that was my crazy day, I've been sick lately do you think it would be an awful idea to mix two lime Airbornes into a medium sized sugar free Redbull in the morning, because my father is making me wake up at 5:30 so I can replace my military id before I loose my medical insurance...which expires conveniently tomorrow. I never said that procrastination was only a maternal trait.
Anne
